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NINTH DIAMOND PEPES COMPANY REPORT

Gen 2 UI leaks? A new entrant to the Celebrity Smackdown? A new set of recipients for our prestigious monthly Company Awards?

With the weather taking a turn for the cooler in the CEO’s hometown, some very welcome days of sunshine and clear skies were a pleasant change of pace. With his lady friend in tow, the CEO spent the weekend venturing on a most splendid adventure into the countryside, gazing longingly at the sprawling green pastures and rustic architecture that are so foreign but still so welcoming.

Lesson of the week?

Do not let the monotony of the day-to-day blind you from the beauties of life. Explore beyond your comfort zones, spend time with your loved ones, be open to new experiences.

“A day for a day,

In secret may lay,

If you do not go out of your way.”

ADMINISTRATIVE UPDATES

UI Updates

For those asking ‘wen Gen 2, wen Gen 2’, The Most Esteemed has tactfully avoided replying in the hopes you would stop asking since development was a bait and Diamond Pepes Pty Ltd.

Pranked, fools.

Pictured below is an incredible preview of our dueling UI!

Oh my, imagine the smell as the CEO achieves a never before seen infinite KDA and reaps in those Ethereal Dollar wagers from unsuspecting children.

Being The Most Esteemed has never been this easy.

Celebrity Smackdown: Introducing Ecosystem Partner #5

In the green corner, we have a project that is fairly new to the Dopex ecosystem. Self-proclaimed as a blackhole for all Dopex-related governance tokens, please give a huge round of applause to the nefarious PlutusDAO!

For those that are unfamiliar with Plutus, allow the CEO to give you a brief rundown.

1. Complete disrespect for authority

Pictured here is a malicious attack against The Most Esteemed. Whilst I am partial to providing complimentary pluteenis/nueenis/weenis/jonueenis inspections to all interested parties (health and self-esteem are two qualities I regard in the highest degree), CEO is a goddamn CEO.

Intern? What in Nu’s name do you fools think you are doing?

2. Flagrant disregard for professional boundaries

As the CEO of PlutusDAO, I, Nutoro, maintain a professional distance from my underlings. Pictured below is so-called “Mesky” breaking these boundaries by issuing me a friend request. Not only does he do that, he goes ahead and berates me as well.

Friend? You’ll be lucky to have a desk come Monday morning, ‘pal’.

3. Failure of simple geometry

Where Mr. Mesky is a naughty naughty man, my dear Ethersole is a kind heart albeit terrible at simple geometry. Pictured below is his recent claim that a 4% lock of DPX in 1 week can be extrapolated to a 208% lock of DPX over 1 year. That’s not how geometry works, my darling Ethersole.

Misunderstanding of basic hypotenuse? Must be a PlutusDAO core contributor.

Celebrity Smackdown: Introducing Representative #5

But just who do we have to represent this cheeky and conniving community? Evidently, the culmination of these deplorable acts meant that there was insufficient honor to warrant an honorary.

Fortunately, we will be having someone with honor stepping in to represent PlutusDAO in our inaugural Celebrity Smackdown.

Whilst she may hold a gun in her right hand, the real weapon is herself. Introducing esteemed Intern, Bulmaeenis.

An autist of a caliber comparable only to her own artistic abilities, Bulma has enjoyed employment at Diamond Pepes Pty Ltd. for about a month. She enjoys bringing coffee to the CEO, giving foot rubs, and opening letters. She got her pen license when she was in just Grade 1 (surpassing her peers by a whole 1 year).

Go get them, Bulma!

Employee of the Month - May

My my my, another month has flown by already and Nu York is now a figment of our memory. Thank you to the Esteemed Riu for “his” brilliant contributions to this beautiful Company but it is time for a changing of the proverbial guard.

The mastermind behind the 10 Commandments of Diamond Pepes Pty Ltd., at just 12 years of age, the Esteemed 12YAK is probably why Child Labor services are constantly ringing our landlines with reports of so-called ‘abuse’ and ‘exploitation’.

Whilst he is enjoying a nice little trip with his family, we hope this award finds him well on his return home.

Employees, lets remember to be addressing our beloved Esteemed 12YAK with the appropriate honorifics lest you face swift, brutal justice.

Un-Employee of the Month - May

With celebration of the good, there must be public humiliation of the bad.

Diamond Pepes Pty Ltd. is proud to introduce the polar opposite of a booba moment with our brand new ‘Un-Employee of the Month Award’. Pictured below is a collection of his recent antics.

Look, idiot, it wasn’t funny the first time and it sure as hell isn’t funny the 100th time. It’s time for you to grow up. And stop asking if the CEO is fine of course the CEO is fine he is a grown man and he doesn’t let juvenile get to him. Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me and these are just words so I am not hurt.

I am fine. Stop asking.

I, Nutoro, Esteemed CEO of Diamond Pepes Pty Ltd. solemnly swear that he will never ever, for the rest of eternity, for as long as the sun exerts heat, for as long as civilization exists, ever be caught out by a DN joke again. Ever.

ACHIEVEMENTS OF THE WEEK

My most sincere apologies for lambasting my poor Employees with this huge wall of administrative updates. CEO will keep achievements of the week nice and short so my pretty beans can return to their delightful days.

As some of you may have seen, CEO has been honing his artistic ability and collected a fine assortment of high quality masterpieces. Pictured below are some of his favourites.

1. Dopex Employees

As a CEO, it is integral you treat each and every one of your Employees with the utmost respect. Leadership is a two-way street - respect your Employees and they will slave away for you without a care for how poorly they are being paid and how wretched their work environment is.

Faster, intern Saitama. CEO has places to go!

2. Boobabulmaeenis

With our introduction of intern Bulma as the esteemed representative of PlutusDAO, CEO thought it would be appropriate to give Employees a sample of her artistic skill.

Whilst she did not actually draw this, her outline was sufficient for the birth of yet another CEO master piece.

Booba, groppa, nueenis as they say.

3. Swing your partner round and round

There is nothing better than spending the night dancing with beautiful women.

Pictured above is myself dancing with Epunksmell’s mother.

PARTING WORDS

A highly eventful wrap up of the week and CEO is looking forward to what the future will hold.

With the UI looking spick and span, it should not be too much longer until our Celebrity Smackdown and the Gen 2 Mint.

As a summary of the representatives for our upcoming event, we will have:

Diamond Pepes Pty Ltd - The Most Esteemed
Dopex - Intern TZ
Mithical - Tetrathick Chode
JonesDAO - Intern IceCreamMan
PlutusDAO - Intern Bulma

6-8., I hear you ask? You’d best stay tuned!

As always, a booba, a groppa, and a nueenis until next time, my beautiful Employees.

Yours truly,

Nutoro

CEO of Diamond Pepes

CA CFA MBA MD PhD LLM

It’s not a phase mom, this is just who I am.

About Dopex

Dopex is a decentralized options protocol that aims to maximize liquidity, minimize losses for option writers and maximize gains for option buyers — all in a passive manner. Dopex uses option pools to allow anyone to earn a yield passively. Offering value to both option sellers and buyers by ensuring fair and optimized option prices across all strike prices and expiries. This is thanks to our own innovative and state-of-the-art option pricing model that replicates volatility smiles.

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